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A Bard's Tale

A Strange and Wonderous Tale.

Once upon a time, but not so long ago that many of The Chosen can still remember the very day it happened, there was a duel. Now you may think that there is nothing special about a duel. The folk have told tales of duels long before there were Bards to tell them. But this was not the usual, run-of-the-hill sort of duel with mysterious mages hurling arcane spells and filling the very air with titanic energies . No, these duellists were no great mages. Aha! Then this duel must have been between two powerful warriors wielding huge swords inscribed with runes of power and strength. But it was not. No, this was no duel between sorcerors and mages or even one between great warriors. This is a tale of a strange and wonderous duel ... a duel between two rogues!

What? A duel between rogues? How can such a thing be? But it's true! This was a duel between two members of The Chosen who were also Sisters of the Bow. Now, you may know that the Sisterhood of the Bow is an old and ancient society, dedicated to aiding their fellows and cleansing the world of Diablo's kin and kith. That a true rogue would never even think of twanging a shaft into another rogue, let alone another member of The Chosen. After all, everone knows that rogues do not duel their brethern. But this is a true story my listeners, so pull up a chair, my children and I will tell you a tale.

One day, the wise and sage Leaders of the Guild admitted a new member to the rolls of The Chosen, a rogue named Thorin. Unlike most rogues, who are gregarious by nature, the members of The Chosen almost never saw Thorin. It was almost as if Thorin were a ghost. When The Chosen frolicked at play or ventured deep into Hell to destroy Diablo's wickedness, Thorin was never to be seen. It seemed that Thorin actually prefered skulking about the dark fringes of the lands of The Chosen on secret missions known only to himself than in joining those brave bands that did nightly battle with the dark forces below the town.

You can imagine everyone's surprise when Thorin appeared one day during a public meeting of the Guild. And you can imagine that surprise changing to open-mouthed astonishment when Thorin, a mere level 23 rogue in those days, audaciously challenged a level 27 rogue to a duel! Even more surprised was poor old Imlach, a noble rogue who had never ever dueled with anyone, preferring instead to kill the dark forces of Diablo rather than slay his brothers in The Chosen. Indeed, no one could ever remember seeing the gentle Imlach duel anyone, either as a rogue or in any of his other avatars: Firefoot, the earnest but incompetent mage; or Maggot, the L7 wanna-be warrior who dreamed of becoming a dreadful destroyer of demons, but had trouble hacking up a rotting carcass.

Well , of course, Imlach refused the challenge, but the young and impetuous Thorin persisted, taunting and teasing the noble Imlach. Seeking to avoid a conflict that could only end in death, Imlach left the Guild halls to check on the safety and progress of a new recruit only to be persued by Thorin into the town. Again Thorin demanded that gentle Imlach duel him to the death! We can only imagine what might have happened had Imlach gone into the Church by himself on that dark day to sheppard the recruit with Thorin in persuit! Assured that the recruit was and well and in no danger, Imlach once again sought out the fellowship of the Guild Hall.

But, like a dog who's gotten the scent, Thorin followed Imlach's tracks back to the Guild Hall. Once there, he resumed his relentless challenge, even going so far as to call the great-hearted Imlach a coward! Can you imagine such a thing? A newby rogue, who had probably never even ventured into Hell himself, calling the brave Imlach, who already had two red dots proudly attached to his portrait, a coward? Inconceivable! And the accusation was made before the entire assembled Guild. The impudent pup! Unbearable hubris!

It was then that the venerable Dora, realizing that such a public insult could never be tolerated volenteered to referee the duel and make sure that all of the Guilds traditions and rules were honored. Reluctantly and seeing no other honorable course of action, Imlach agreed to duel for the first time in his life and for his very life. Dora found a suitable church and hallowed the ground, cleansing it of vermin and corpses. She stationed Imlach to the west of a large open space and Thorin to the east. Lest there be any confusion, great Dora recited the rules of honorable combat and made all ready. Casting a signal flare, the duel began!

Now everyone knows that the natural weapon of a rogue is the bow. Imlach's usual bow was the famous WindForce. But just the day before, Imlach had lost WindForce in a doomed battle against overwhelming odds in Hell. This day, he would be fighting his first duel with a mundane bow purchased from Griswold, the town blacksmith. The craftsmanship of that poor bow was a far cry from the beautiful WindForce, but his honor was at stake and there was no time to wrest a better bow from the depths of Hell. What was not generally known at the time was that a great bow of power had been given to Thorin by one of the mighty among The Chosen. A bow young Thorin could never have hoped to posess so early in his career. A bow that could have tipped the odds in his favor.

Everyone was waiting for the fusilade of arrows to fly, but none came! Honorable Imlach had resolved never to cast the first shot. If the blood of rogues was to be spilt, Thorin must spill the first drop. Suddenly, without warning, a wall of fire sprang up next to Imlach! And another. And another! The whole west end of the chamber was soon carpeted with flames! Walls of fire? Where were the arrows? What kind of rogue with a secret bow of power would resort to the tricks of a sorceror? Everyone was stunned into disbelief. Fortunately, the agile Imlach dodged the flames and survived the treacherous onslaught. 

Then came a curious sound ... the sound of phase shift! More mage's trickery? There it was again! Surely Thorin couldn't be trying to cowardly circle around Imlach to position himself for a shot in the back? Imlach didn't believe it, but having seen his fellow rogue stoop to using magician's tricks, he cautiously turned, drew his bowstring and covered his rear. The room was silent save for the sound of the still burning flames and ominous phase pops. Then, suddenly, in a terrifying moment, Thorin was there, behind Imlach's back. If Thorin like any true rogue had drawn his bow and shot, it's hard to say whether Imlach would have died first from the shock or an arrow in the throat. But Thorin paused. We'll never know if he was surprised to see Imlach's face instead of his back or if he was readying yet another of his dishonorable spells, but in that moment of hesitation, Imlach finally let fly a shaft ... and another ... and yet another ... until Thorin screamed pitiously and with a horrible last choking gurgle, fell lifeless to the floor while his earlier flames died out all around him.

Now some will say that the Thorin and Imlach in this tale are the very same rogues now numbered among The Chosen. And some will say that they are not. If you were to ask Dora, who has been the Leader of the Guild since there was a Guild, she would tell you that she has seen many things in her time but very few duels between rogues. And if you were to ask the present day Thorin about this particular duel, he might tell you that it never happened or, at least, never happened this way. And if you were to ask mighty Imlach? Well, ordinarily you wouldn't of course, but if you did have the timerity to ask, you would only hear silence.

But I have heard it said, that if you were to find him very late at night, in front of a cozy fire, with a warm drink in hand, and if you were to ask him very very politely, and if there was no one else about ... he might just show you Thorin's ear.

Derwen{DE} Posted for Iduel of The Ancients...